>Today was church and I was there. I always try to be there, I became a little slacker and now am making a concerted effort to go every week. I missed last Wednesday for a combination of reasons. So when I noticed my friend Emilia was having a rough time, other friends crowding around to support her. I wondered what was up. I got a little annoyed since it was obviously something big, like maybe a death in the family, I figured it had been announced Wednesday and no one had bothered to tell me. I racked my brain trying to remember if both her parents were alive, then I figured, oh it couldn’t be one of her family since she’s here, it must be a relative of Wayne, her husband.

After services were over I walked over to see her, everyone was hugging her and as I stood next to another friend who put her arm around me, I still had no clue. But I was the good friend and hugged her and pretended to understand and know, know what?

When Em and I were getting ready to go to the gym, she told me what had happened, “Wayne’s gone.”

Gone. Gone as in just gone. Just packed up his stuff and left Emilia and the church community and everything. They had been married for a while when I met them, over 20 years ago, they must have been married for over 30 years. They were always low key about things like their anniversary and stuff.

How does someone do that? After 30 years just pack up and leave? “Oh its been fun but I really have to go now.” “This has been a nice experiment but I don’t think it’s going to work.” “You’re a really nice person but I just don’t think we’re compatible.” “I really do love you but I don’t think I want to live with you.” After 30 years? I can’t wrap my head around this, I’m pretty sure Emilia can’t either. I mean, I don’t know how she was in private, but she was always super nice to everyone. There never seemed to be any real problems between them. Maybe that was the problem, no conflict, no excitement, maybe he just got to bored to stay.

As I was sitting here thinking about this and thinking about another person who might have lost her home, I realized that I am a horrible person. These people’s lives are falling apart and I’m complaining about my cold toes!