Category: Manhattan


My best friend has been encouraging me to go to college. Full disclosure here, it won’t be ‘going back to college’, since I never went. She went to college and has her bachelor’s degree and is now looking at law school. She graduated summa cum laude with a 4.0 GPA. None of which is encouraging me to actually apply for college since I know I won’t do as well. I”m about half as intelligent as she is. However tonight I applied. New York State is offering free tuition.

It isn’t as easy as I hoped it would be.

As I was filling out the application it said I needed to submit my FAFSA ID, which I don’t have and I was routed to the website to apply for FAFSA. So I started the application process, including questions I had no clue so I guessed, I hope I’m right, if not I’ll either owe NYS a billion dollars or go to jail. I can handle jail. I couldn’t handle debt. Anyway, somewhere in this process, in the middle of my soul crushing confusion I tweeted:

Someone replied with a gif of Woody saying “You’ll be fine, Partner”. This is someone that I am pretty sure I have never met in person, just on social media. As I looked at the tweet and thought, “She doesn’t know me”, I then thought of the 80 people who formed a human chain to save 9 people caught in a rip tide and saved their lives. To those 80 people, it may not have seemed like a big deal, but it was a huge deal to the people they saved.

Just like, to the person that responded to my tweet, it might not have seemed like a big deal, just a quick search and post, but it encouraged me. It made me think, that maybe I can do this. Maybe I can start a new chapter in my life. Not life saving maybe, but certainly life changing.
 

Before anyone jumps all over my shit, I know my definition of a bad day is nowhere near as bad as some people’s bad day. Some people have cancer, some people are abused, some people are homeless, have no healthcare, have no friends, voted for Trump and now realize he lied to them. OK that last group I have lost all sympathy for. If you are stupid enough to believe his lies, you deserve all the pain you get.

Whew. Today started good, no work, so no getting up early, in fact I didn’t get up to lunchtime. That’s when the shit hit the fan. It look like I had spilled coffee on my kitchen counter, but to the left of my sink and my coffee maker is to the right of my sink. Then I smelled the liquid and it smelled like vinegar, but I don’t have vinegar in my apartment because I am allergic to it. Then I thought, maybe I spilled beer, you know, maybe I poured a glass of beer, didn’t drink it and when I poured it out I missed the sink (could happen right?), so I started to clean it up, picking up the things on my counter and rinsing them and mopping up the spill, then I noticed it was all over the wall, and on the underside of my cabinets! What the actual FUCK happened here?

I had been boiling water to cook pasta for my lunch. I turned off the water, I cleared off my table, moved everything from my counters to the table and washed the counters and my wall. The liquid seemed to be coming from behind my kitchen cabinets. I looked above them and there were no stains so it wasn’t coming from the apartment above. That leaves only one explanation. Demons. My apartment is possessed by demons. I briefly considered calling my landlord, but decided against it.

Then I got diarrhea, while doing my laundry.

Getting off at 86th Street a young Japanese girl playing the violin. She stands by the stairs with her tiny violin and the case is open on the ground. Today it was filled with dollar bills. The last time I saw her it was empty. She plays fast, always the same music, or type of music and over by the wall an adult is watching over her. She never smiles, in fact her facial expression is rather unpleasant, like she doesn’t want to be there.

Too many people. The Q was supposed to make my life easier and reduce crowding on the subway. It doesn’t seem to have worked. I had to wait for a second train because the first was too crowded.

Man with a red bike. Not a folding one a regular one. Which leaves me with the question why take the subway when you have a bike? I know it was cold but I saw other people riding their bikes. If I had a bike I would ride it every chance I got.

Twin girls about 7 years old wearing matching fur leopard prints hats with ears and matching pink coats. One of the girls had matching mittens (to the hat), grey tights and bright blue and pink sneakers. The other girl had pink gloves, pink tights, and pale pink Mary-Janes.

Second Ave Subway partie deux

After all my complaining about the new subway, i decided I should give it a try. It does make my commute easier and faster, except for having to take the elevator at the Lexington Station (claustrophobic me?). And of course I took pictures. The first set is from the 96th Street Station by Rite Aid. The roof over the entrances is clear. They look white because it had snowed.



This next set of pictures is from the Lexington & 63rd St. Station, elevator exit to 3rd Ave.

Snowpacalypse is a ‘new’ word, a made up word combining ‘snow’ with apocalypse, which shows you how much they (the ones that made it up) know since they spelled it wrong. It’s also a word i hate and never wanted to use. I find it distasteful to use a word that refers to God’s judgment for a weather event. It’s a blizzard, let’s stick with that.

While i’m on my soapbox, why are we naming storms? Hurricanes are named because there are several in a season, there are five lists of names to rotate between the years and the names are in alphabetical order. That’s how you know if it was a particularly bad year, if you can a hurricane Tanya, that was a bad year. This naming of blizzards is rather haphazard. Winter Storm Jonas? Why not just ‘the January blizzard of 2016’ if you are worried there might be more. ‘The blizzard of 2015-16 winter’ if this is the only one.

I knew it had snowed before i opened my eyes, the snow plows on 2nd Avenue woke me. When i look at my windows i can see snow on my windowsills. The snow plows came by again so it must still be snowing, i haven’t looked out my windows yet. Not even when i heard some guy screaming for help, once. I hope someone helped him, or it was a joke.

Normally when it snows like this i go to the park and take pictures. Maybe tomorrow, today i’m staying in.

Opposite day

Today’s commute was not a CFH, in fact it was the exact opposite. I did leave 15 minutes late but then I got to the bus stop before the bus. At the subway station, train pulled in when i was at the bottom of the escalator. Queensboro plaza the train was pulling in as i got to the bottom of the stairs.

The result was, i was only 10 minutes late to work.

On the subway

There is no place like New York and nothing like the NYC subway system. I have determined there are three types of people that talk to me on the subway.

There are the people who ask for money. From what they say, none of them do drugs, none of them drink, all have suffered some unimaginable tragedy and can’t get government assistance.

There are the people asking me for directions. “Do I look like Google maps?”

There are the people offering to help find your train, this is usually followed by a request for money, so they could fall into the first category. What is really annoying is some of them feel they need to lead you to the correct train and “STOP TOUCHING ME”. I should get a medal for not stabbing people.

Then there is your random crazy person, like the tall skinny black man that told me I was “a white whore and you’re going to die of AIDS and cancer.” And the woman who offered me oral sex. She was convinced I would love it and I was just, “Ew no, germs.” Like I said, I should get a medal.

Do you remember the dress?

It was a while ago. Not a super long time but not recent. What color is the dress? It went viral as they say, to the point that a scientist wrote an article about why some people saw one color and some saw another. Even though much attention was brought to it, I never paid it much attention.

One day this week, on the subway, I was standing next to this woman, she was talking to a girl that was sitting down looking at her phone. It looked like mother daughter, so that’s how I’ll write it. The daughter asked her mother to look at a picture on her phone, the first time it was too dark, so the girl adjusted something and showed it to her mother again. I glanced down, it was ‘the dress’. “What color is it?” the daughter asks, “Blue and black” the mother says, the daughter agrees. I looked at the exact same image as the woman, I saw a white and gold dress.

MIND. BLOWN.

Breaking ALL the rules

People always comment how New Yorkers don’t wait for the walk signal, we just wait for the traffic to clear and dart across the street. It’s like we are a city of rule breakers. I have to agree, let me explain.

What’s the biggest rule moms tell their kids? No not clean your room! That’s mom’s fantasy. No moms are always telling their kids, Don’t get in a car with a stranger. Right? So you live your life running away from ride offers from people you don’t know.

Then you move to NYC, and you don’t have a car because, A) it is freakishly expensive to keep a car in NYC; B) the subway and bus system is beyond compare, who needs a car? Then one day you’re in a rush, you need to get across town RIGHT NOW, so you stick out your arm, a yellow car stops and you get in. You get in a car WITH A STRANGER. BOOM, mom’s rule has been broken.

But wait, you say, it is this strangers job to transport you safely to your destination (notice I said safely, not necessarily untraumatized, but I’ll consider cabbie driving habits in another post), maybe so I say, BUT, we all watch TV, and we know there are serial killers masquerading as taxi drives just waiting for a snowstorm and an unsuspecting victim! Once you break this rule and survive, this emboldens you break other rules, like crossing against the light. It’s no wonder we all do it.