As I was getting my nails done, this girl next to me was talking to the owner of the salon. The owner is Korean, the girl (I’ll call her GF) is Asian but not Korean, her boyfriend (BF) is Korean. GF was talking about BF’s mother (Mom) and the salon owner was explaining to her how Korean mothers are (these are not my words, I am telling the conversation as I remember it). The salon owner was saying Korean mothers want to know this and that, GF was saying, Mom wants to ask her questions about ‘this and that’, BF tells Mom, don’t ask those questions. She feels bad for Mom, but doesn’t want to interfere. Also, since she doesn’t speak Korean, she doesn’t know what Mom is telling BF about her. For instance, Mom told GF, BF can be nasty. She replied to Mom, oh he’s always been sweet to me, because she is afraid Mom will tell BF, she said you were nasty. She doesn’t know what Mom has said about GF to BF in the past.

It seems like a lot of work.

On occasion, people have told me I should get a boyfriend. I tell them I don’t have time for a boyfriend. What I really mean is, I don’t have the energy for a boyfriend. It could be because I have not had good relationships in the past, all the way back to the relationships with my parents and siblings. I only really like one of my siblings, and I have always felt only one of my siblings has really cared for me. My boyfriends were always happy to become my boyfriend, then after a while, I wasn’t ‘right’, and I needed to change to fit. One went so far as to tell me what kind of socks I should wear and what color lipstick.

Being single, completely single, may be lonely a times, but it is better then being miserably because the one you love isn’t happy with you for reasons you don’t understand and can’t change.